All of These Lines Across My Face

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am.
So many stories where I've been
And I got to where I am.
But these stories don't mean anything
If you've got noone to tell them to.
It's true - I was meant for you.

Brandi Carlile


Several weeks ago PS (Pam and Susan) and our husbands went to a concert where one of the opening acts was Brandi Carlile. It was a glorious night at an outside amphitheatre and the words above from one of the songs have rolled around in my head ever since.

I was lucky enough to watch a love story for all of my life. My parents were married 58.5 years before my father's death in April. They married at 18 and 20 and spent all of their lives together weaving a story of love and devotion in some wonderful times but also some dreadful ones. During 8 years of illness my mother cared for my father's every physical and emotional need in a way that someone young would find hard to do not to mention someone in her mid 70's. The toll these years took on her are clearly etched in her face. The depth of her sorrow after she lost the love of her life has been harrowing to watch.

In our family my Dad was the keeper of all the stories and memories. His mind was a steel trap of information, dates and details. We all almost felt panicked that we could never remember it all. For now, my mother is the very epitome of "the stories don't mean anything if you've got noone to tell them to".

It is yet another transition in life to both watch a parent die and to watch another one lose their confidence and strength. But it is a reminder of what we can do for the ones we love - smile as they fly away, step back from being a full time mom, be strong as the people we love have to live their own lives and fight their own battles, be there in both the good and the bad times, keep moving forward step by step through whatever life presents to us, remember the stories of our lives...in all of these things my mother has raised the bar for us. Hopefully my siblings and I are up to the task!